How Much Social Media Is TOO Much?

So…as a writer, where should I hang out? Let’s see…

Facebook…Twi–I mean “X” *eyeroll*…Threads…YouTube…Myspace…Instagram…Snapchat…Live Journal…Bluesky…Pinterest…etc., etc., etc.. (Yes, I had a Myspace page at one time, and a Live Journal).

It’s all too much. Anymore, it feels like it feels like we have to be everywhere, or we’re going to miss out. FOMO: you know what it is. The fear of missing out. If we aren’t everywhere, we’re going to miss out on readers, we’re going to miss out on news, we’re going to miss out on sales…on friendships…on drama…gossip…and that leads to overwhelm, overwork, and panic.

It seems silly, really, to be afraid that if we aren’t in a dozen places at once that we’ll miss out, but it’s very real fear for a lot of writers, and I know it’s also real artists of all types, for anybody who likes to keep their finger on the pulse of what’s happening.

In this day and age of celebrity influencers, there’s a sense that has grown up that if you aren’t on social media, causing a buzz, you’re a nobody, left in the past. There are people who count their worth in followers, and people who buy their ‘worth’ by buying followers. There are kids being unwillingly shoved in front of the camera with all the ‘family vlogging’ going on. There are ‘influencers’ who use their power to take advantage of their followers. Social media, which should be a fun outlet for entertainment and connection, has turned into a circus of drama, clout-fighting, and potential dangers.

Now, I’m the first to admit it: I enjoyed my time on the Bird, before it turned into a seething cesspool. In the early days, it provided a wonderful place to connect with other writers, to gather round the watercooler, so to speak. But then, it began to change. And I noticed that I was spending far too much time there, scrolling and scrolling, not getting work done, and getting more and more overwhelmed.

And every time a new platform emerged, like a lot of other writers, I migrated to it. And each time, it felt like more work, and more energy, and I felt more jaded. I admit it: I hate Facebook, but I have a group there, because people don’t want to leave it. And it’s one way to keep contact with my IRL friends who live a ways away. Except…except…I’m energy-sensitive, even through the computer screen. And their sadness–I feel it. And their anger–I feel it. and the general turmoil…I feel it, and it drains me of energy and it jades me, or angers me, or saddens me, or…so many things.

So I’ve finally been taking advice from my coach. I broke from Twi–X–altogether. I deleted my account there. If you see someone with my name there, it’s not me and it’s not authentic. I’ve pulled away from Facebook a lot, and we’re doing less in my group. I’ve decided I’d rather focus my time on creating a safe, respectful community on the Witchy Chicks blog, in my newsletter, and on my Patreon. Places where I have some control over what goes on.

And you know what? The past few weeks since I’ve substantially reduced my time on Social Media? I’ve been calmer. I’ve gotten more work done. While the events in the world are in turmoil and affect me deeply, I’m spending less time on fretting over what I can’t do, and focusing more on the ways I can affect the world: through my writing, through my connections with people who matter, like my readers and my personal friends, rather than shouting into the void at the anonymous masses.

So how much social media is too much? It’s individual. Ask yourself–is it affecting my mood in negative ways? Am I becoming less empathetic? Does it interfere with my work? My sleep? My focus? If you answer yes to any one of these questions, you might reconsider how much time you spend on these doom-scrolling sites–where the messages are quick, fleeting, and sometimes, damaging?

What about you? Do you spend too much time on social media? If so, how has it affected your life?